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Wednesday

 

VCOP Story By Alex

suddenly a terrifiying roar shook the room, and Digma nearly snatched Patch luckily Patch pounced away.



Despite having a great pounce Patch landed on his ankle"ow!" Patch cried they all ran over to see what happened.



Digma caught a glinpse of the gang round Patch. He put his gewy,smelly,slimy arm out and grabbed Magnus. "help!" cried Magnus.



Luckily Magnus escaped and ran away to the gang,then one of the caves fell in on Digma and they off the rocky place and back to their house.

Is Digma still alive or will he come back to haunt them...

# posted by Woodhill Primary School @ 3:47 AM
Comments:
* Good ending

* It made me feel like i was there

wish- There is a capital at the start of every sentence you didn't put one in suddenly

Ben
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 3:25 AM
 
*good vocabulary
*good information of whats happening

wish-you mist out a capital for suddenly
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 3:34 AM
 
*star* Good volcabulary

*star* Good use of speech

?wish? check the spelling of glimpse

Logan
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 3:51 AM
 
*Star*-Interesting story.

*Star*-Good ending.

!Wish!-Some of your punctuation is wrong.

Jenny
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 3:44 AM
 
*StAr*- Your Story Was Very Execiting!

*sTaR*- You Have Good Vocabulary!

!WiSh!- Use More Execiting Punctuation
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 3:47 AM
 
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