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Monday

 

As The Snow Is Falling by Logan and Chloe

As I look out the window
I see the snow is falling
I get a chill upon my nose
I feel that winter is calling

As I wrap up warm
I see the children play
Hat, scarf, gloves and earmuffs
Now the snow has come to stay

I go up on the hill
To ride my sledge up high
And then I build a snow fortress
And inside there I lie

Click here to listen to As The Snow Is Falling by Chloe

Click here to listen to As The Snow Is Falling by Logan

# posted by Woodhill Primary School @ 4:13 AM
Comments:
*Star* - I really like the phrase 'winter is calling' and I love the image of you lying in the snow fortress.
*Star* - You have read the poem with good rhythm.
*Wish* - Can you add commas and full stops at the end of the lines to show readers where to pause.
# posted by Blogger Woodhill Primary School : 12:54 PM
 
Logan and Chloe

I have read your poem and listened to you both reading it. I was really impressed!! What a great poem and you both did a fantastic job of reading it so clearly. I look forward to hearing another of your pieces of work.

Miss Young
# posted by Blogger Woodhill Primary School : 9:35 AM
 
Megan and Nadia, Mearns Primary

Star - You spoke clearly
Star - You didn't get stuck on any words
Wish - Next time can you make it a bit longer?
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 1:13 AM
 
STAR - I liked the way that your poem rhymned.
STAR - I liked the line "I get a chill upon my nose"
WISH - Try to change the first word of each line and make them different.
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 6:18 AM
 
*+*star*+*-i get a chill upon my nose.

*+*star*+*-i see the snow is falling.

?wish?-start your sentences with a diffrent word.
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 6:53 AM
 
*star* i liked the line i feel that winter is calling.

*star* i also liked the line "now the snow has come to stay."

^wish^ i thought that poem was really good i liked it.
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 6:56 AM
 
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